My Favorite Veteran

I never had a shortage of important women in my life.  I've had many "moms" growing up.  From the mothers of my friends that would consider me one of their own, to my aunts that I've always looked up to, and most especially the woman who gave birth to me.  A lot of women have always played an important role in my life.  And it has made me realize that I haven't focused enough on the important men in my life.  Though today has made me reflect on a few of those men so dear to me.  And I thought it appropriate to take pause and honor them.

Growing up, I never really knew the importance of Veterans Day.  Sure, when I was in elementary school, I remember Grandpa showing up to have lunch with me one time when our school was honoring veterans.  And I liked to look at the old black and white photographs of him in uniform.  I even thought the gun salute at Grandpa's funeral was cool.  Especially when his grandchildren were given a shell casing from the salute.  And one time I drove to the cemetery around Veterans Day just so I could see flags that graced the graves.  I did smile with a little pride that my grandpa's grave had one of those flags.

But for some reason, it didn't all resonate with me all those years.  Maybe it's because of the state that our nation is in now.   Maybe it's the division of patriotism; the lack of unity in our country; or the lack of proper leadership we've had and continue to have.  But today... today Veterans Day is special to me.  It only took me a few decades to really comprehend, and maybe I still don't fully.  Tonight, I sit and stare at my veteran and maybe my eyes are a little moist, and my heart a little tender.  Maybe I'm longing for a sweet embrace.  All I can really is say is that I'm thankful for him.  I'm proud of him.

This day actually makes me think of two men in uniform that I love and miss.  Though, I'm not sure the other would be considered a veteran, I still like looking at his black and white picture in uniform.  My Grandpas were both handsome in their uniforms.

Irvin Butler, WWII

Grandpa Butler served as a pharmacist's mate in the navy during World War II.  I was so young when he was alive that I didn't think to sit down and ask him about things like this, so I never got to hear stories from his time in service.  But I wish I had.  I do know that he has a special veterans gravestone, and it says "PHM2 US Navy World War II Korea".  I thought about him when I visited a naval destroyer on my honeymoon and some old sailors sat around and told us war stories as we wandered the lower decks and stopped for some hot chocolate in the mess hall.

David Heideman 1957

Grandpa Heideman was in the ROTC in the late 1950's.  I don't know much about his time in the ROTC, but I love the smile on his face as he stands in his uniform.  I think his parents took the picture and this moment is one of the main moments I picture when I remember him.  I know that just being in the ROTC doesn't make him a veteran.  In fact, he didn't finish the ROTC because he found a pretty girl, got married, and started a wonderful family.

So Happy Veterans Day to all those Veterans out there and their families.  Thank you for your service, and for the sacrifices you all made.  We remember you.  We love you.  And we miss those of you that are no longer here.

A Year and a Half of Happenings and New Beginnings

August 2016

I wasn't even back to Idaho Falls yet before that course change happened.  Annaleese had already gone to bed when I got a Facebook message on my phone from a friend back home.  I was not sure how to respond and I almost didn't. In fact, the question was so out of the blue that I was wondering if maybe she'd been hacked or something.  I was going to go back to bed but I had a strong feeling I needed to just answer her.  So, I did.

August was still feeling pretty normal to me.  Usual wildfires.  I guess they weren't that usual.  The Henry's Creek fire burned up more land than I remember ever seeing burned at once.  My sister's husband's family lost a lot of their ranch to the fire.  That was pretty dramatic.  My dad and sister went up to the ranch to help her in-laws try to fight the fire and save as much as they could.

This was just the beginning of the fire, but it spanned a lot of land already in the beginning and moved quickly.

This was a strange cloud forming out in the Ammon Foothills that I could see forming from my backyard out of the smoke coming from the fire.

I went on a blind date set up by the friend that messaged me on the way back from Minneapolis & St. George.

All dolled up for the date.

And celebrated Azer's 1st birthday.  This kid was the cutest.  He wasn't sure about eating his cake and didn't know how he felt about his fingers getting into the gooey frosting.

I loved watching him experience this new thing in his life.  Because he lives so close I have been able to watch this kid grow up and that was a real treat.  He definitely was my #1 guy.  Even though I'd just been on a pretty hot date.

Oh yeah, that blind date I went on.  It was with my friend's nephew.  And it was amazing.  He took me to the museum to the exhibit I had been dying to see.  The one about the Rebels of the formation of America in 1776.  And we went to lunch at Carino's for Italian.  Although, we did more talking than eating.

September 2016

Took an impromptu road trip into the hills to see the fall leaves with my dad, Uncle Dave, and Grandma Butler.  It was a nice road trip.  One that I was really glad to have the opportunity to take with them.  I enjoyed riding in the backseat with my grandma and able to be silly with her for the duration of our trip.  I will cherish that trip forever as it was the last road trip I had with my grandma.

And that quiet little blind date taken?  Yeah, there were more dates. And more.  And even more.  And texts. And dates.  And more texts.

Well, something is happening here, so might as well document it with a selfie. 😉

October 2016

My favorite part of this time of the year is getting to see all the pumpkins.  I like carving them, I like seeing what others have done to decorate them.  I love Halloween.  

This year it was fun to get to see Azer's first reaction to pumpkins.  I love discovering the world through his eyes.

I got to reconnect with my "bestie" cousin and her adorable daughter.  Brittanie and Lennie enjoyed some delicious food with me at Panera Bread (my new addiction).  And I got to gush to her about this new boy in my life and be all girlie with her.

Oh yeah, and I went out on another date with that guy.  We went to pick pumpkins with his brother's little family.  I guess you could say that I was starting to fall in love with the entire family. Friendships were growing.  I enjoyed spending time with Beth, Brett, and Lil Brett.

This guy took me to my very first Jazz Game. (I didn't know at the time that my cousin's husband just got a job with the Jazz, selling tickets!)  And then we had a brief, romantic moment atop the Joseph Smith Memorial Building in Salt Lake City.  It combined two things I love: rain and city-scapes; but it did rain us out of enjoying the rooftop for too long.  I wouldn't know until later that the rain I love so much prevented a very special event from happening. 😉  But more on that later.

November 2016

So that guy I went on a blind date.  The one I'd gone on many more dates with.  The one I picked pumpkins with.  The one I spent time with his family with.  My Utah Jazz fan companion (he turned me onto a love for the game).  Well he had a very special gift in his pocket when we visited that rooftop.  While I took quick pictures of the view, and while we got rained out (or off for that matter).  We spent maybe five minutes atop that building before they closed it for safety.  Apparently rain can make for slippery footing.  We went to that Jazz game, and he contemplated...

But it wasn't until a Sunday afternoon, on our way home from church that he asked me to the Idaho Falls LDS Temple Visitors Center.  (The Idaho Falls Temple was still closed for renovations).  It's our favorite temple.  And it was my favorite time of the year.  The beauty of the fall leaves, and my favorite place on earth.

I didn't know that Cody, yep my blind date guy, had brought 12 red roses to the visitors center before we went to church.

We sat down in front of the welcoming image of Christ.  And he excused himself off to the bathroom.  Having been a long time since I'd been to the visitors center, I wandered over to the pictures of the First Presidency.  While I was smiling at a picture of one of my favorite apostles, Pres Uchtdorf, Cody came up behind me.  When I turned around I saw him with the roses, and that special gift he'd had in his pocket in SLC.  I already knew what was happening before he got down on one knee and asked me to be his wife.

The lovely missionary couple at the center that were in on it were now grinning.  The sister was having a hard time containing her excitement before and told us we'd want a picture taken.  So she kindly took our picture.  Though it wasn't the best lighting or picture.

And then we took our own as we walked the greenbelt.  We tried to get the temple in the background.  But it's kind of poetic that it's a faint image behind our heads.  (We both wanted to wait for the temple to reopen so we could get married there, but the reopening kept being delayed.)

 I said yes.

Of course.

The whirlwind of the Holidays had begun.  We started by announcing our engagement at Thanksgiving.

Attended The Forgotten Carols on a double date that then turned triple when we met up with my mom and dad after.  When we planned the date we didn't know that my dad would be asked to sing in The Forgotten Carols so that was an added treat.

Thanksgiving was a quiet little event with my parents and my brother, and I tried out my very first custard-like pie.  It was delicious.  Butterscotch, my favorite.

December 2016

Christmas was approaching and I wanted to get more serious about losing weight before the wedding. I started a program that my cousin introduced me to and started to see results right away.  I was dedicating 12 weeks to hit a Wedding Weight goal.  (I lost 30 lbs by the time I got married!!)

We split our very first Christmas together between our families and I got absolutely spoiled with presents from both sides.  And somewhere in there was a trip to Temple Square to see the Christmas lights.

As the year came to a close a couple of other exciting announcements came for our family.

And my joke with my mom over the years about my life being like poor Edith from Downton Abbey was becoming a little more true than I imagined.

(Spoiler for anyone watching the show for the first time):  Edith finally gets married and her sister Mary finds out that she is expecting another child at the same time.  Only in the Butler story, not one but two sisters are expecting new babies.

January 2017

Oh, and that big scary birthday I was worried about?  Well it was one of the happiest birthdays I've had.  The best present of all was that I had just 2 months left before my wedding.  As part of my birthday present, we were able to pick up my wedding ring.  And the custom wedding band we designed would come later in the month.  The ring is diamond and sapphires (adding my very favorite color into my ring.)

February 2017

My sister threw me a Tea Party Bridal Shower, and it was so fun.  We took photos on a Polaroid type camera and scrapbooked the pictures.

In between wedding planning, hoping my custom ordered wedding dress would come in time for the alterations I was gonna need after losing so much weight, I got spoiled on the very first Valentine's Day that I actually had a very special love in my life.  Finally!  They were no longer "Single Awareness Days" for me.  Yipeee!

And then toward the end of February, my heart got broken.  A woman who was influential in my life, who I had so many years of memories with: from road trips in the RV, to drives to see fall leaves, washing fresh carrots from the garden in her backyard pool with my cousins;  a woman I loved, respected, and deeply miss, left this life.  It was so hard to go and sit with my cousins, aunts, uncles, and dad in my grandma's nursing home room and watch some of the final days/hours of her life.  But those are also days that I will never forget.  Bittersweet moments, tucked away in the sadness, where I got to see my cousins, aunts, and uncles in a new light as we all struggled together to deal with the hardest trial..  I came to admire them for the little things they did to care for my grandma.

The last picture I took with her helped me capture her silliness as I tried to sneak a selfie with her.  Even though this was taken a year and a half before her passing, I didn't know at the time it'd become so significant.

Sneaking my picture

Getting caught and getting that finger wagging she always gave.

March 2017

The day before my wedding, we said goodbye to my grandma.  It was a beautiful funeral and I was glad to have my whole family there.  It even allowed some of them to attend my wedding. :)

Finally the day had arrived that I'd been waiting for what seemed like forever.  I married my best friend, surrounded by friends and family.

And of course, the day wouldn't be complete without a photo with the woman who was at the heart of it all.  So grateful I listened when I thought I needed to answer her text.

A Year and a Half of Happenings and End of an Era

I guess it's pretty safe to say that this last year and a half (give or take days or weeks) has been full of the greatest adventures of my life.  Great ups, great downs, and the makings of the woman I am today.

My last Happening, posted July 26th, 2015, was right before I headed into a bit of a depression that I can only now admit to.  I'd been through a bad experience and was wanting to forget it. I struggled to find my footing, plunged into a period of depression, and ultimately started down a path that was instrumental in changing my life, and shaping me.

If it weren't for my mentors, and the wonderful self development program that Doterra has, I am not sure how the last year and a half would have gone.  My dedication to self development is what really carried me through the tough times and helped me to enjoy the good times.

July-August 2015

Last bit of July I took my little sister's maternity pictures.  We did them just in time before her little guy came.

August was all about working out and getting healthy.  The workouts became a great anti-depressant for me, and it was nice as I began to reclaim my life through health and fitness.  I was continuing on a weight loss journey I'd been struggling my way through for months but my determination was strong.

A night out at the Idaho Fall's Chukars game with my dad was a nice little memory to be made.  I started to enjoy sports more after attending the live event, when I'd never taken much interest in it before.

And with the tail-end of August, we welcomed my newest nephew into the clan.  It was fun to visit him in the hospital and see him on his first day.

 Azer's first Nephew Selfie with one of his favorite aunts.

September 2015

Took my first trip to Dallas, TX to visit my bestie, Annaleese and her wonderful family.  It was a trip full of memories and I absolutely fell in love with the place.  While there I made some new friends that Annaleese introduced me to and we all had a fun filled weekend at a Supernatural Convention.

October 2015

Trying to squeeze in as much nephew time with the little guy, I joined him and his mom to listen to LDS General Conference.

And also satisfied some baby snuggle cravings at his baby blessing when I also got some time with my 2nd youngest nephew, Toby, that I hadn't seen in a while.

December 2015

Started the month off by spending time with some friends in St. George, Utah.  It was a small weekend try-out while I made my decision to move in the coming year.  While there I enjoyed visiting the general store where they had all the kinds of soda you'd ever dream of and we learned just how difficult it is to take a selfie on a moving carousel.

But so fun to look at the outtakes after. When the ride finished, the nice elderly man operating the ride offered to take our picture for us.  Guess he noticed how much trouble we had.

While still in St. George I drove to one of the impressive homes that decorates for Christmas.  And added blonde into my hair!  It was the last time that I did anything with the color of my hair, as I decided to let my hair grow out natural.

Closed out the year with a blue and silver tree, Christmas village and all the Christmas cards received displayed on the piano; and I got ready for my new adventure.

January 2016

Rang in the New Year with my family at an epic party at my brother's house.  We got to enjoy a little performance from a little boy band I'm partial to.

I also started the year off by turning the big "3-0".  Which was a little hard for me.  Struggling with depression still and faith.  I didn't believe in myself, and I didn't believe in my dreams.  Turning 30 meant the end of a lot of possibilities for me.  It played into my decision to move.  I was searching for new scenery, a change of pace, and trying to hide from my fears. I was running from what I was so afraid to face in exactly 12 months (my 31st birthday). I didn't want to know what life at 31 and being single would be like for me.

And so my adventure began.  The big move.  I left my home and my family to join a house full of roommates of all kinds (cats, a dog, & some favorite humans) in a city I'd fallen in love with over the past several years as I visited friends that I love so well that I rather consider them sisters.

 30th Birthday, here I was.

New home, new best friend.

This little kitty and I spent a lot of time together, and we adored each other.

Went home at the end of January for a visit, and broke up the long drive by crashing at my brother's house where I got in some fun time with the nieces and nephews.

March 2016

After losing an entire month in February to the flu (influenza is nasty) and a Netflix marathon of the X-files (interesting show to watch with a fever and sickness fog), I headed back to St. George to resume my adventure. Mars and Greg took me for a nice drive out to the beautiful scenery of Ivins where we saw a beautiful rainbow peeking out after a storm.

Then Annaleese, Kim, and I took on Las Vegas.  We were joined by Maggie, and the four of us made some incredible memories at another Supernatural Convention.  

We passed the time in line for karaoke night by taking some crazy selfies.  

And went viral on the internet after our epic photo op with one, Jensen Ackles (Dean Winchester, Supernatural, CW).  Let's be honest.  It was Kim's face that made us all famous.

The pic that launched 1,000 retweets. (Ha!)

Annaleese and I took the next weekend to follow the convention tour to Seattle, WA.  Yet another city I just had to go and fall in love with.  I'd been wanting to see the place ever since I was a little girl because it is where my mom is from.  The city already held a special place in my heart that was locked in when I finally got to visit the place.

I was able to squeeze in a quick tour of the city when Marcela met up with me and took me to the top of the Space Needle (crossed that off the bucket list)

 Top of the Space Needle. (Marcela was there, I swear.  I don't know why I don't have a photo w/her)

April 2016

Took an epic "hike" near the house.  We left right from our front door.  But met with some challenges on the way when we found the trail was full of mud.  All we were trying to do was get some exercise and achieve our goal of walking to Harmon's!  I think we were trying to walk a mile and a half or so? #FitGoals.  We sank in a lot of places, the mud sucked off our shoes, and I was lucky to be wearing black yoga pants for when I actually fell into the mud while trying to yank out my missing shoe. This red mud was like a distant cousin to quicksand, I swear.  Those white socks never recovered.  Neither did my shoes.

 

I did get to head back to Idaho to watch my sweet cousin get married.  And to catch up on missing baby snuggles from Azer.  We documented the event with a mandatory wedding selfie.

May 2016

Celebrated my sister's birthday.  And had so much fun taking her family photos.  The little guy wasn't into it as much as the rest of us.  He'd rather play with the grass as he discovered the fun of the outdoors.

Back in St. George, it was time for another road trip.  Girls Date Night with Mars in Las Vegas.  We both were excited to eat at the Rainforest Cafe and while we were there we got to take pictures with the hottest hunk there.  Mars was nice enough to share Joe with me for the night.   #CreepsOfLVStrip

  

And then we attempted a walking selfie on the strip as it was way too crowded to stop, nor did we want to. 

June 2016

Middle of summer, and we chose to go to Phoenix, the week after they were having record highs in a crazy heat wave.  115 Degrees.  It was still pretty hot when we got there, but the heat was dry so it was bearable. And in case you didn't guess the reason we were there already?  Why else would Annaleese and Tay hit up Phoenix?  Besides our red carpet makeovers?

Just another Supernatural Convention where we got this gem of a photo that inspired a sitcom we wrote on our long drive back to St. George.

Right after my Phoenix adventure I returned to Idaho Falls to help with costumes for the Sounds Summer Musical.  This year they did Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat.  And while my dad was involved on stage as one of Joseph's brothers, my mom and I hung out backstage (in my opinion, the best spot), and watched everything behind the scenes.

July 2016

4th of July weekend, I spent back in Utah, at my brother's new home he bought.  We lit some fireworks, and had a Ninja Turtle pajama party.  Well, just Auntie Tiffany and the boys that is.

Matching outfits with Seamus and Toby (and a Constance photo bomb)

July was my busiest traveling month.  In fact I was rarely at home.  Not only did I take too many trips for one month, but I added in a move back to Idaho Falls.  Leaving behind some of the greatest roommates I had, Mars' kitty that I fell in love with, and a city that I still miss.  But I felt strongly that the move was right for me.  I just didn't know why at the time.

Trips included a weekend in Dallas, TX to celebrate a friend's birthday and meet another friend's adorable "big" puppy.  My first meeting with an English Mastiff.  My first visit to Lewiston, ID and Clarkston, WA with a fun planetarium show with one of my best friends, Megan.  We learned about the Juno project that NASA launched to learn more about Jupiter.  And then from Lewiston I headed over to Seattle again to revisit it properly with Marcela.  She played tour guide to me again but this time we fit in a lot more sights and discovered the Columbia Tower observatory offered much more impressive views of Seattle than the dated Space Needle.

At the advice of my friend, Cinthanie, I checked out Alki Beach and decided that if I ever struck it rich, I'd move into an Alki Beach Condo to live out my days.

 

No Seattle trip is complete without a ferry ride.

August 2016

One more Supernatural Convention with Annaleese.  Our last one.  And this one we spent in Minneapolis, MN.  I've been wanting to return to Minneapolis ever since the 5th grade when my family took a trip there.  To my disappointment this year, the Mall of America wasn't as grand as I'd remembered.  The Lego Store wasn't near as epic as when I was a kid.  And the saddest part was finding that Camp Snoopy, the theme park in the middle of the mall, was now turned into a Nickelodeon themed park.  But I did go on the ride "Fly Over America" and saw the sights, sounds, and smells of America. (All part of the ride).

The end of an era for this Supernatural Touring Duo.

It was time to stop travelling.  I'd done so much of it in 2016 that I was starting to feel a little displaced.  Even with all the self development I'd done, I still felt there was something missing and as much as I tried to find that happiness, nothing I tried was filling that hole.  The past year I'd taken strength from these internet memes and inspiration posts and I didn't know just how close I was to the biggest change of my life.

Looking back on it reminds me of a quote from one of my favorite movies.